As a psychotherapist and counsellor I have found that individuals often seek help when they feel their life just isn't working anymore. Some express feeling they are not living their own life, but trying to please others much of the time. Depression and a sense of futility can arise when this pressure prevents the expression of our true self. Psychotherapy can offer a safe, confidential place to explore emotions that may have been hidden and neglected for many years. Feeling met by compassion rather than criticism or judgement can enhance trust and the ability to bring deep rooted issues out into the open. With the relief of feeling understood comes a strength and clarity that can help to make sense of life events. It is then possible to experience how they have impacted on our way of trying to manage in the world. This is a time when distressing feelings can be transformed into a deep understanding of our true nature. As we learn to express without fear, the feeling of being alive and more spontaneous can grow. A way of interacting with others without compromising ourselves becomes possible.
What two people bring to a relationship from their own individual development, and past experiences of relating, forms a powerful third entity. At times this can be experienced as negative with each partner looking to the other for a soluton. Couples counselling can help to identify ways of addressing the differences in one another. This can create the possibility of recognising our own, and each others individual strengths, but also helps us to feel less fearful of one anothers' vulnerabilities. The recognition of ourselves as part of a third whole, but also as seperate individuals can be liberating and bring about a shared closeness that is chosen rather than imposed.